Why You Should Make More Mistakes

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One of the most powerful secrets to success is making mistakes.  Yet, from the time we started school we have mostly been taught that mistakes are the worst possible thing you can make.  Our grades were almost always determined by the number of mistakes we made, so we are programmed to avoid mistakes and avoiding anything that risks such failure.

I’m not talking about making stupid mistakes caused by carelessness or indifference or unethical or illegal behavior.  The kind of mistakes you should make are the inevitable failures that come from trying something new or doing something out of your comfort zone that moves you toward something worthwhile.

Here are 3 reasons why you should make more mistakes:

  1. Making mistakes means you are BEING DECISIVE.
  2. Making mistakes means you are TAKING ACTION.
  3. Making mistakes means you are LEARNING FASTER.

When you are being decisive, taking action, and learning from your failures (and from your successes), you will inevitably more forward toward your goals and the big successes you want for your life.


I just got an awesome question from one of my coaching members on, “What do you do when you get no show? What do you do when you get stood up on a listing appointment?” In this case, he had a listing appointment with a For Sale By Owner. Although it doesn’t matter who it is, it can be anybody. You have a listing appointment and you go to their house and they’re not there. He actually had it happen to him not once, but twice. The same seller stood him up twice! Now, they want to reschedule for a third time.

How do you deal with the no-show? How do you deal with a person who stands you up? Here’s how you do it.

#1 Don’t get mad. When you let emotions enter into your conversation either anger or frustration or irritation or annoyance or impatience, any of those emotions create negative energy and they going to create a barrier between you and them. They’re the amateur, you’re the pro. As a professional, you’ve got to maintain emotional stability and emotional calm at all times. You want to be kind and yet, it’s okay to be straightforward.

#2 You say, “Great, no problem. I understand how things like that can happen. So when would you like to reschedule so that we can get together and talk about helping you guys make this move happen? I can come out tomorrow afternoon 2:15 or we can do 4:15. Which should be better?” They say, “Let’s do 2:15.”

#3 “Perfect so I’m putting that in my calendar right now. I’ve got a us down for tomorrow at 2:15, awesome. I just want to make sure, do you have your calendar in front of you or your schedule in front of you? Cool so you got it in your calendar? Great because I just want to make sure that tomorrow when I come over at 2:15 that we’re actually going to be able to sit down and meet. Is that fair enough?” “Yes.” “Great”

#4 If they’re like, “Well, I’m in my car or I’m at work, I don’t have my calendar in front of me,” say, “No problem, why don’t I do this, as soon as we hang up I will shoot you a text message with just a reminder of our meeting time for tomorrow on your cellphone. Would that be the best way or would you prefer an email? Or I could actually do a calendar invite.”

All I’m doing is I’m being helpful to them to give them ways, I’m giving them a way to save face because I’m not accusing them or got mad at them for standing me up once but I’m giving them ways to make sure they don’t have an excuse to stand me up again. All right? That’s the main thing.

Now, what if you have a chronic repeat offender who stands you up over and over and over again, so three or four times. If they stand you up once, you deal with it. If they stand you up twice, okay, they better at least make me feel guilty and a little apologetic or I’m thinking they’re just jerking me around.

Let’s just say they say, “I’m so sorry and something came up and I just … At work, I work, my boss is this way and I can’t deal … ” and so forth, you say, “No, I understand, I certainly understand how life can get you caught up so let’s do this. When there’ll be a time when we can get together that we can avoid that kind of a situation occurring again. I’ll work with you on the time and you set up the time, you just say great. I just want to make sure that we’re going to be able to meet this time.” Now, let’s just say they stand you up again and they go, “I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry.”

Now, here is before I set up another appointment after they stood me up two or three times and you kind of pre-framed him, you kind of had this conversation with him and they stand you up again, they go, “I’m so sorry, something came up.” “Great, well, listen, no problem, I understand how things can happen, we can reschedule if you want to. Let me just ask you this before we do that. Are you sure you still want to meet? I just want to make sure you really want to meet and actually talk about making this move happen or if you’re just having a hard time telling me “no”. Then they go, “Oh no, no, it’s just been busy, we still want to meet.” “Okay, cool.” What I’ve just done is I kind of taken away from them … I’ve given them an easy out and if they’re standing me up two or three times, look, we’re almost done here.

If you’re serious, you’re going to have to say you’re serious and I’ll even say this. I’ve even said this before, say, “I understand how things can happen. I just want to make sure that you’re not just having a hard time telling me “no” because if you were a girl and I’d ask her on a date and they stand me up three times, I kind of get the feeling they’re probably not interested. You know what I mean?” And they go, “Oh no, no we’re very interested, we want to meet with you.” “Okay, awesome,” but what you’ve done is, without beating them up, you’ve raised the bar of expectation and you’ve given them an out so that they’ve confirmed, “No, we definitely want to meet” because you don’t need to get stood up by somebody over and over again, who are just not interested in meeting and having a hard time telling you “no”. You wanted them to treat you with respect, you’re going to treat them with respect and kindness, you deserve the same.

Don’t be afraid to have a straightforward, kind, patient conversation with them but at least raise the bar so that they know that you’re serious and they’re not going to waste your time and you’re not going to waste theirs. That’s the way it goes and when you do that and you approach them with that top professionalism, you can always, if they’re serious, expect “yes!”

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