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Buyer Asks You to Give Them Part of Your Commission, And You Say…



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What do you do when a buyer asks you to give them a part of your commission?

Here are 3 stupid answers you DON’T want to say…

  1. “No.” This ends the conversation but it also ends the relationship because it puts them on the defensive. 
  2. “I can’t.” It doesn’t make them want to work with you more…and tells them that you’re not an agent who has power and authority. Watch this video on Why “No” is the Dumbest Objection Handler Ever, and what to say instead.
  3. Sarcasm. (e.g. “Which room in your house do I get?”) It’s cheesy and doesn’t get to the point.

Here’s an excerpt of the BEST answer (because it respects them and their question, focuses on their benefit, and increases your value as the agent that can get them the best result)

“That’s a great question. My commission isn’t part of the negotiation. Can I explain why?

Because…unlike many unskilled agents, my value is in getting you a better deal on the home you choose…” (for the complete script to use, watch the full video)

Get more in-depth training on how to handle objections in a way that makes people want to work with you at Agent Mastery Live Virtual 2021. Learn more here

Full Transcript

You’re working with a buyer, and your buyers ask you to give them a part of your commission. What do you do? What do you say, and how do you tell them no? 

Now, I have had this twice already in 2021. I’ve had two people ask me, “How do you deal with this? Buyers ask you to give them a part of your commission. What do you do?” And then I saw it on a Facebook group for realtors. This question came up. It was very interesting to me, in the Facebook group, when it was asked, there were literally hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of people that answered, how do you say no when a buyer asks you to give them a part of your commission? 

So first thing I want to do is talk about what I call the stupid answers. And then we’re going to talk about what is the best answer of how you can actually say no to giving away a part of your commission, and yet do it in a way that adds value to them and builds the relationship, rather than distances the relationship.


3 Stupid Answers You Don’t Ever Want to Say


I literally have seen hundreds of agents that answer that. This is why you don’t want to go to Facebook groups and depend on their wisdom to help you learn how to get more yeses. 

Now, does “No” handle the objection? And the answer is yes, it handles the objection. The problem is it also puts them on the defensive. It may end the conversation, but it also ends the collaboration. It’s no longer you working with them and it’s now you working against them. They’re trying to negotiate for your value.

And so the worst thing you can ever do on any objection, no is the worst. Well, let’s just say this. I’ve got another video that’s going to be posted in the next week. I’ll post the link as soon as we get it up. I’ll post the link down below in the comments here on the dumbest objection handler ever. 

So if you’re watching this video and it’s been up a week, you’ll have a link down below on the dumbest objection handler ever, on why no is the worst thing you can ever say, and how to deal with it. Okay. So no, don’t just say, “No, I won’t do that.” It just ends the conversation and it definitely hurts the relationship.


2. “I can’t. 

No, I can’t do it. I would love to, but I can’t. I can’t, because it’s illegal. I can’t, because my broker won’t allow it. I can’t because my commission’s not mine, it belongs to the broker,” or whatever it is. All of that is either incorrect, inaccurate, or just basically BS. 

But the worst thing is, it doesn’t make them want to work with you. If you say, “Well, I would, but I can’t, because you don’t have a license, so I can’t give you a referral.” Well, one, that is legally inaccurate. And yet I saw on the Facebook groups, when I’ve seen this question asked, countless agents will go like, “Well, you don’t have a license. I can’t give you money.” Well, that is not actually true.

What almost every state in the United States, and this is strictly for the United States and North America, is that you cannot give a referral fee in most states to an unlicensed person. Well, your buyer is not a referral. They are a principal in the transaction, and a principal in the transaction, you can pretty much do anything you want, as long as all parties are aware and so forth. 

Now, this is not legal advice. I am not an attorney. But that’s just the truth. That’s just the way it is. So don’t ever say, “Well, I can’t, because you’re not licensed, and I can’t give referral fees, or I can’t give money to somebody who doesn’t have a license.” That’s not true. And if you say, “Well, I can’t, because my broker won’t allow it,” that may be true, and it may be legit.

Here’s the problem. It makes them not want to work with you, because they want to work with somebody who can do stuff, not who can’t. Because all you’re telling them is that you don’t have power, you don’t have authority. 

And people instinctively, if they’re going to work with a professional who represents them, they want somebody who has power, somebody who CAN, not somebody who can’t. And so anytime you say I can’t, that is what we call a resistance trigger. Just like “No” is a resistance trigger, it creates resistance, “I can’t” is also a resistance trigger.


3. Being sarcastic. 

Here’s some of the sarcastic answers… “Well, okay. I’m happy to. Which room of the house am I going to get?” Or something like that. “How much equity of your house am I going to get?” Or, “Well, I’ll give you a part of my paycheck, if you’ll give me a part of your paycheck.” 

Any answer like that, if they’re really well-played, they may be a little humorous and all that, but it’s also kind of cheesy and does not get to the point. I just want to know if you’re making all this money, why don’t I get some of it? Only in real estate do we ever have to even negotiate our pay. It’s just, it’s kind of a crazy thing, but it is the way it is.


How to Answer the Question

Let’s talk about how you actually answer the question. I’m the buyer. I want a part of your commission. What are you going to say? 

Just acknowledge the question. “Hey, that’s a great question, and I appreciate you asking. My commission really isn’t part of the negotiation. It’s just not. Can I explain why?”

“Number one, because unlike many unskilled agents, my value is in getting you a better deal on the home you choose. See, the reason buyers work with me is because I help them get the house they want. I actually help them get it. And I help them get it for the best price, with the best term, meaning you actually pay less for the house, and you have lower monthly payments every month for as long as you own the house. Now, that’s a pretty nice bonus, right? That’s a pretty nice benefit. Excellent. Now, and the best part of this all is, is that I help you get a great deal, and then the seller is actually the one who pays me for working for you. So it’s really, you get a double win.”

Game over. Every single time, that will end the conversation. And even if they still want to say, “Well, yeah, but,” but they get it. 


3 reasons why this answer is a better way to answer the objection. 

1.It actually legitimately respects and honors them and their question. We’re just trying to get the best deal. We’re just trying to figure out how we get out of this with the most money in our pocket? And we figure we’re going to pay all this money for the house and you’re going to get paid some of it. Why don’t we get some of that back as a rebate? Well, some agents, that’s the only value they have, is I don’t really do anything for you other than do paperwork, so here, here’s part of my commission to make you feel better.

But when I answer and say, “You know what, that’s a great question, and I appreciate you asking,” you’re respecting their question and you’re respecting them. And then you simply give a straightforward answer. And here’s the straightforward answer, “My commissions are not part of the negotiation.” That ends the expectation that we can negotiate on commission. 

So I’m laying the groundwork, but it’s not because I can’t, it’s because that’s not the way I work. But if I just go like, “Well, yeah, but that’s not the way I work. That’s not my business model,” then it’s about me and the way I work and my stuff. 

They ask about my commission, so I just say, “My commissions are not part of the negotiation.” And then I shift the conversation. “Can I explain why?” Now, that is a very simple yes or no question. And of course, they’re going to want to know why. So they’re going to say, “Well, yes.” 

“Because” is an influence trigger, which I train about in my coaching. “Because unlike a lot of the unskilled agents out there, my value is in getting you a better deal for the home you choose.” In other words, “My value is not giving you a part of my commission. My value is I actually help you get a better result.” And in doing that, you contrast yourself to the other agents out there who aren’t skilled, who aren’t powerful, who don’t know how to get them a house and how to get them the best deal on a house in terms of terms and price. 

And then you say, “The reason that buyers work with me is because I help them get a better deal.” And what are you doing? I’m now generalizing that it’s not just you. This is the reason people want to work with me, which implies I have value. People want to work with me, not because I’m cheap, but because I get them a better result. So we turn the conversation from the cost of me to the value of me.

So now you’re not talking about your costs, i.e. commission. You’re talking about your value of why people want to work with you as an agent. Why? Because I get them a better result, I have more value, and so they’re happy when I get the commission. Why? Because I helped them get a better deal, which means they paid less for the house. It means they get to keep more money in their pocket, and they get lower house payments because they got a better deal on the house, which benefits them month after month after month for the entire time that they own the house. 

“Now, that is a benefit, right? That’s a huge benefit. And then after all of that, guess who actually pays my commission? The seller pays me for working for you, to help you get a better deal. So that’s a double win for you. It doesn’t cost you anything, and you get a better deal from working with me.”


2. It’s collaborative. This means that you’re working together and that what you’re doing (and the way you do it) is for their benefit…not yours. It’s not about you protecting your commission. It’s about you helping them get a better result. 


3. It makes you more valuable. It’s not your commission that’s valuable, it’s you. So it’s not your commission they want, it’s you that they want. After this conversation is over, they now have more loyalty and want to work with you more than they did before.


What are your thoughts? What experiences have you had on this? How have you handled it in the past? What did you learn from this video? Make sure you put those in the comments down below. 

And if you want to get all the best objection handling training in the industry, if you want to get the very best, join me at Agent Mastery Live 2021. Go to to get your ticket. 

You’ll spend three days with me, and we’re going to spend a lot of time talking about how to use communication and how to handle objections in a way that actually makes people want to work with you more.

 If you like the video, give it a thumbs up. Make sure you subscribe to the channel. If it’s your first time here, play to win, and always expect YES.

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